Day 59 - Yoga and Derma

10:08 AM

I began my relationship with yoga about 15 years ago, and it was contentious for a long while. Having struggled with OCD for most of my life, most times getting out the door in itself is a difficult challenge. Not to mention going into an intimate class setting and then into some very strange positions. But I never gave up on yoga - or I should say, i never gave up on myself within and as my practice.

I have decided to take on OCD in this life, and in one way or another, everything I do relates to this battle, either directly or indirectly. Battling OCD is much like battling an addiction. This battle is also going on at a dna level, where I've inherited this disorder through genetics. Some would say this is impossible, at least not without medication.

I did get to a point where I was advised to take medication, so I have tried medication. What I did with that is that I learned from it. I could see it's effects on me and I could see that it would also be possible to have the same impact on myself through decision-making in self-awareness. So I could mimic the effects of the medication within myself, but of course, this takes mental-discipline and consistent self-awareness that I am still developing.

One tool of support I learned from the interview Creating Balance while Changing Yourself is how to establish a balance between letting go of the old, while creating the new. Letting go of OCD while creating the new me as Who I Am and Will be without this disorder in my life.

Very true, from the description:

This interview shares practical and creative ways to give yourself structure as well as freedom when taking on the more challenging and addictive patterns you want to change.

It has been many months since I learned about this balance, and over the months I have continuously applied the practical application mentioned in the recording.

I wrote out a list of things I would like to work on developing in my life, and then a brief 'how-to', keeping it very practical in terms of making it very live-able for me in my life and current situation. The list includes everything from exercising more regularly, to developing self-expression, maintaining an orderly and tidy environment to down-time.

This application gives me the structure and foundation upon which to support myself to stand as I tackle the challenges of facing OCD. Part of it is the fact that when I previously tried 'just stopping' OCD, there was a big space, gap or hole left in my life which I sought to fill and didn't know how. It would inevitable always lead back to OCD. Or, I would try to replace OCD, but that made everything I did about the disorder and not about me. There is a slight difference between replacing and addiction and letting go of an addiction. This is emphasized in the recording and the outcomes are very different - one leads to healing while the other to suppression.

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  1. Addictions are also diseases with genetic components. You suggested that there is a distinction between OCD and addiction here, and there is not.

  2. I edited out the distinction for accuracy, thank you for the feedback!


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